Finding love not always rosy in fickle digital age

Love-seeking singles often attest to a dating scene riddled with drama and disappointment.

Experts offer them a glimpse of the tough reality facing Australians seeking their ideal relationship online in the wake of a Valentine’s Day spent alone.

Users on the likes of Hinge, Tinder and Bumble often become trapped into an endless cycle of use, says says author and academic Lisa Portolan who holds a doctorate on dating apps and intimacy.

ā€œPredominantly these dating apps are where people are meeting each other but they’re doing it in a very episodic or cyclical sort of way,ā€ she told AAP.

ā€œThey might go on for periods of time and then not find what they’re looking due to being bored or whatever it might be.

ā€œIt might be two weeks, it could be six months, and then eventually they circle back. So it’s a bit episodic alongside that.ā€

In an ironic twist, Generation Z – those born after 1996 – are turning to more traditional ways of finding love.

ā€œI mean, dating apps have really struggled to engage with Gen Z,ā€ Dr Portolan said.

ā€œA lot of Gen Z do meet organically … I think that the kinds of synthetic experience of dating apps has less appealed to Gen Z.ā€

Ryan Anderson from Monash University’s School of Psychological Sciences said shunning apps can often lead to ā€œmore authentic, intentional datingā€, regardless of age.

ā€œI’ve noticed that the landscape seems to be shifting,ā€ he said.

ā€œPeople are embracing low-cost, in-person events and ā€˜future-proofing’ conversations by discussing finances and long-term goals early on,ā€ he said.

ā€œIt’s probably fairly safe to say that more people are romantically interacting online than ever before (but) there’s a noticeable shift toward transparency and meaningful connection over the casual swipe culture.ā€

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Holly Hales
(Australian Associated Press)

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